Bland On Bland – Cool

RRRBBQDay2014_046The theme for this week’s JVG Radio Method poem is “Cool“.

Good afternoon Jon and welcome to Spain.

All the hard work I put into mastering the Italian language is now pretty much useless, although I still have the universal translation aid, my fingers, which have been getting a very strenuous workout.

After a fantastic week in Barcelona I’ve traversed the country to Seville, and have just made it back to my room after a very long and incredible night of flamenco singing in a small neighbourhood bar.

I received a very passionate and animated welcome from the locals, none of which I could understand but at the end of the evening I was told by the guitarist it loosely translated to “Piss off arsehole this a private function” which explains the birthday cake and the free drinks.

He informed me they had only decided to let me stay because I just kept smiling and saying thankyou in very bad Italian.

Sometimes ignorance can be both handy and very, very cool.

To play this poem directly in your browser – just click the “play” button below:


Is Gaudi dowdy? Is Gaudi Gaudy?
Fruit on a church? Joyous or bawdy?

Is Gaudi cool or is Gaudi hot?
An ugly wart or a beauty spot?

Gaudi, the soul of Barcelona
Would he have gelled with Melbourne’s persona?

In Australia, would he have emerged?
Or sunk without trace; genius purged?

Our conservative bent, a source of frustration?
Could we have coped with such innovation?

No fruit adorns a Melbourne spire
We like our buildings straighter, higher

Politics rules decision
Backroom deals devoid of vision

Soaring clutter to match the clatter
It appears, in Melbourne, size does matter

Sterile towers, excess to need
Art cannot compete with greed

Our lanes, reborn; while above, it wilts
The city choked by slums on stilts

Granite gorges, concrete chasms
We need architectural iconoclasm

A mace to smash our reactionary mold
Can cool survive in streets so cold?

Why don’t I leave Melbourne for vistas more grand?
Where else could I live with a name like Bland?

© Copyright 2016 Ian Bland

Also have a listen to the songs on “Angel In Reverse

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