Bland On Bland – Pain

Bland On Bland – The BookThe theme for this week’s 3RRR JVG Radio Method poem is “Pain“.

2022 and still phoning the show in. The format this year is still giving us a bit of time to play with how the poems are presented…

Ed Bates provided the musical backing.
Thatch provided the audio production, have a listen to how it went below…

To play this poem directly in your browser – just click the “play” button below:


Pain? Through my life I’ve had a few aches
Gashes, bruises, fractures and breaks

Been whacked a few times; don’t get me started
Drilled a hole through the web of my thumb and it smarted

I’ve been bitten by spiders, wasps and bees
Jelly fish, ferrets, a Pekinese

Scorpions, crabs, even a fox
Had measles, mumps and chicken pox

I was kneed in the balls, kicked in the shin
Stiches in my cheek, forehead and chin

Impaled my foot on a rusted bolt
Hurt like hell but it wasn’t my fault

Kicked by a horse, butted by a goat
I once had a chicken bone wedged in my throat

I got salmonella from a dodgy paella
I’ve had a broken heart and a broken patella

Nose bent sideways, blood on my shirt
I freely admit it bloody well hurt

Been splashed with acid and boiling oil
Haemorrhoids, blisters, an infected boil

Toenails ripped off, a broken jaw
Hair caught up in an electric saw

Savaged by monkeys, tore chunks off my back
A car crushed my foot when it came off the jack

Hit my head with an axe, teeth through my tongue
Punched a nail through my hand and I tell you, it stung

A ruptured appendix, split lip, a black eye
I once caught my penis in the zip of my fly

Fallen from motorbikes, ladders and trees
Dislocated shoulders, ankles and knees

I’ve been electrocuted, fallen through glass
A misguided fishhook snagged in my arse

I’ve had cuts, bruises, splinters, and sprains
Burns, grazes, rashes, and strains

I’ve been lashed, slashed, mangled and gnawed
Stapled, pierced, burnt, pinched and gored

So yes, I’ve been hurt, but as for real pain?
I’ve not lived in Sudan, the West Bank, Ukraine

Or been held in detention, beyond mercy and law
Suffered the Holocaust; witnessed a war

Had those I love disappear without trace
Or been judged by my colour, religion or race

Defined by gender as fair game or too frail
Had my lands taken, thrown into jail

Lost all in a bushfire, a cyclone, a flood
You can’t erase pain, unlike ashes and mud

Bias, injustice; the pain never thaws
The symptoms remain till we deal with the cause

© Copyright 2022 Ian Bland

Also have a listen to “Everything or Nothing

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