February 22, 2009 | Ian Bland | Leave a comment Ed Bates The theme this week for the JVG Radio Method is “SHUT UP“. Todays poem and theme are the result of a rather nice piece of serendipity. Ed had a birthday party yesterday where I was asked to right a poem and JVG liked the idea so much he decided that it would make a good theme. Or something like that. The upside for me was I only had to write one poem. Click here for today’s poem [audio:JVG_Poem20090222.mp3] Ed Bates is on slide today. Shut Up Ed “Shut up Ed” snaps Jon Von Goes before Ed can say a word Chastised live on radio Ed mumbles below his breath, mouth 2 metres from the mic If he feels humiliated it doesn’t show To the contrary in fact, a smile, accompanied by a chuckle Chuffed he’s needled such a strong reaction His steel slides up the strings mimicking a chicken A victory tune to flaunt his satisfaction As you know, an only child can think the world revolves around them Though I’m not suggesting Ed is such a creature Still it’s been an onerous task that’s had me close to beaten Identifying one redeeming feature I first saw Ed in 75 – the famed Pelaco Brothers I remember thinking who’s this moody prick When that band morphed into Sports they obviously agreed Cause it wasn’t long before he got the flick But a player of Ed’s calibre is never idle long I’ve watched him through the years, band after band The only thing that’s changed, he’s ditched guitar for pedal steel So the lazy bugger doesn’t have to stand Eventually we met in the kitchen at RRR I’d been warned he was something of a grump I found him busy with a fork combing lumps out of his coffee I thought “This can’t possibly be Ed – it’s Forest Gump” Sitting there resplendent in a blue Hawaiian shirt The epitome of aging rock’n’roll His eyes burned as fierce as a feral German Shepherd As he defended the last coffee scroll He was in heated conversation with a poster on the wall “Another money grabbing foreign act on tour” “Never heard of them” he cried “Bloody B Grade hacks” I said “You wouldn’t Ed, they were born after the war” Even though he’s gagged from speaking on the show It’s where Ed has really found his voice While I think it’s fair to say he doesn’t suffer fools gladly On the JVG show he doesn’t have a choice © Copyright 2009 Ian Bland Share this:TweetEmailMoreTelegram