Photo By Jools Thatcher

Photo By Jools Thatcher

The theme for this week’s JVG Radio Method poem is “Ten“.

Afternoon Jon, and greetings from Coventry once more

Yet again, and very eerily the weekly theme is following me around.

The theme was “Tom” a couple of weeks ago and at the time I was doing battle with my recalcitrant sat nav nemesis “Tom Tom”.

“Wild” was the theme the week before and I had just been to a Dan Wilde gig at the Nursery Tavern, and yesterday as I was writing today’s offering beside the statue of Lady Godiva, an evangelist handed me a booklet titled “Ten Seconds to Live” which ironically took me ninety seconds to read.

When I pointed this out to him he told me I was going to hell – just a well I like travelling.

To play this poem directly in your browser – just click the “play” button below:

Also have a listen to the tracks on the new EP “Once We Were Kings Of The World


There’s the smell of smoke in Downing Street
It’s coming from number Ten
Prime Minister David Cameron
Not the happiest of men

His conservatives in open revolt
Coalition falling apart
What issue, so dire, so cataclysmic
Could strike at the Tory’s heart?

The war in Iraq? The economy?
Is the E.U. behind the malaise?
Something far more divisive, – marriage
For lesbians and gays

Conservative activists up in arms
Values rocked to the core
More of moral dilemma it seems
Than welfare reform or war

Even disparaged by one of their own
Who labelled them “Swivel eyed loons”
The goings on in the House of Lords
Like a script straight from The Goons

The threat to royal succession
Has Lord Tebbit in a tiz
What if the Queen was a lesbian
Of course not referring to Liz

If a lesbian queen married her girlfriend
Think of the threat to the nation
The heir to the British throne conceived
By artificial insemination

C’mon your Lordship, what’s wrong with that?
It’d be a real crowd pleaser
When the king or queen drops off the peg
Whip another one out of the freezer

Not content to leave it there
Lord Tebbit, continued to wax
Joked,he may even marry his son
To avoid inheritance tax

Why is it rabid homophobes
Despite their strong denials?
Link homosexuality
With incest and paedophiles?

A caution from Sir Gerald Howarth
Conservative MP
“There are plenty in the aggressive
Homosexual community”

“Who see this as but a stepping stone”
Warned the member for Aldershot
“A stepping stone to something further”
But he failed to tell us what

If people love and care for each other
Does the gender really matter?
Who needs Tories anyway?
Not when we’ve got Bob Katter

© Copyright 2013 Ian Bland


Sir Gerald Howarth
“There are plenty in the aggressive homosexual community who see this as but a stepping stone to something even further”

Lord Tebbit
The determination of David Cameron to press ahead with legalising gay marriage opens up the possibility of a lesbian queen giving birth to a future monarch by artificial insemination, Lord Tebbit has warned.

In one of his more outspoken interventions, the former Conservative party chairman told the Big Issue magazine that the legislation could also allow him to marry his son to escape inheritance tax.

Tebbit’s remarks indicate that the marriage (same sex couples) bill will have a bumpy ride when it reaches the House of Lords.

Tebbit, who said that ministers have “fucked up” by alienating Tory grassroots, accused Downing Street of forcing through the legislation with little thought.
“The government discussed it for 20 minutes on the morning of its announcement,” he told the Big Issue. “They’d done no work on it beforehand.”

Tebbit also said he had challenged a minister about legalising gay marriage at the same time as ending male primogeniture in the royal succession.

“I said to a minister I know: have you thought this through? Because you’re doing the law of succession, too.
“When we have a queen who is a lesbian and she marries another lady and then decides she would like to have a child and someone donates sperm and she gives birth to a child, is that child heir to the throne?”

Tebbit joked that the change could allow parents to marry their children as a way of avoiding inheritance tax. “It’s like one of my colleagues said: we’ve got to make these same sex marriages available to all. It would lift my worries about inheritance tax because maybe I’d be allowed to marry my son. Why not? Why shouldn’t a mother marry her daughter? Why shouldn’t two elderly sisters living together marry each other?”

Lord Tebbit, who recently said he could understand why many people vote UKIP, said the party would attract greater financial support if they won the European parliamentary elections next year. He said: “If they make significant gains in the European elections, I know there’s people rich enough to get involved and fund a significant campaign at a general election.”

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