Bland On Bland – Failed Rock Stars

RRRBBQDay2014_046The theme for this week’s JVG Radio Method poem is “Failed Rock Stars“.

Good afternoon Jon and welcome from Zahara de la sierra, a village in Andalusia, promise I won’t mention the weather this week.

One of the things I’ve realised in my travels is how rare and precious genuine community radio of the quality and independence we are blessed with in Melbourne is, and I urge any listener who is yet to sign the petition to guarantee continued funding for community radio to pop onto www.keepcommunityradio.org.au and have your voice heard.

With the election looming it is important we act now.

Failed rock stars, eh, that covers just about everybody I know.
I can only imagine you’ve chosen the theme to coincide with next week’s Reclink Community Cup at Elsternwick Park, though I’m not sure if it’s referring to the Rockdog players or the Megahertz presenters – foot in both camps I guess.
Either way, one thing’s certain, whatever the result it won’t be pretty but it will be a great afternoon’s entertainment so get down to Elsternwick, have a laugh, witness some seriously dodgy umpiring and support a good cause.
My prediction, Failed Rocked Stars by two points – still not sure who that is

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Bland On Bland – Where Someone Comes From

RRRBBQDay2014_046The theme for this week’s JVG Radio Method poem is “ Where Someone Comes From“. (Seriously Jon???)

Good afternoon Jon and welcome from Ronda, in the south of Spain.Thirty nine degrees today Jon, I know how much you like the heat so I thought I’d share that with you.

Thirty nine degrees today Jon, I know how much you like the heat so I thought I’d share that with you.

Last night I was taken by one of the locals to a small bar where they have live music once a week.At the end of each set the singer, who is also the chef shot out to the kitchen to knock up a few plates of tapas, the guitarist went back behind the bar to pour beer and the cahoun player returned to cleaning tables and washing dishes before dashing back on stage.

At the end of each set the singer, who is also the chef shot out to the kitchen to knock up a few plates of tapas, the guitarist went back behind the bar to pour beer and the cahoun player returned to cleaning tables and washing dishes before dashing back on stage.Why is it the drummer always seems to get the short straw?

Why is it the drummer always seems to get the short straw?

You meet a lot of interesting people when you travel, and I’ve been keeping a note of some of their stories, today’s offering courtesy of an encounter I had in Rome a month or so ago.

Finally, I’d like to dedicate this to Dan Towart, a loyal friend for over forty years.

Did I mention it was thirty nine degrees Jon?


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Bland On Bland – Cool

RRRBBQDay2014_046The theme for this week’s JVG Radio Method poem is “Cool“.


Good afternoon Jon and welcome to Spain.

All the hard work I put into mastering the Italian language is now pretty much useless, although I still have the universal translation aid, my fingers, which have been getting a very strenuous workout.

After a fantastic week in Barcelona I’ve traversed the country to Seville, and have just made it back to my room after a very long and incredible night of flamenco singing in a small neighbourhood bar.

I received a very passionate and animated welcome from the locals, none of which I could understand but at the end of the evening I was told by the guitarist it loosely translated to “Piss off arsehole this a private function” which explains the birthday cake and the free drinks.

He informed me they had only decided to let me stay because I just kept smiling and saying thankyou in very bad Italian.

Sometimes ignorance can be both handy and very, very cool.


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Bland On Bland – Unofficial Measurements

Photo By Jools Thatcher
Photo By Jools Thatcher

The theme for this week’s JVG Radio Method poem is “Unofficial Measurements“.

Good afternoon Jon, and greetings, once again from Alhama de Granada, high in the mountains above the Andalucian or Andulusian coast – I have no idea which, if either is correct.

Despite a concerted effort, my command of the Spanish language has failed me yet again.
I went out to buy wine; I came back with a cod.
I ordered chilled sangria, I was served grilled goat.
My attempt to compliment our host’s house unfortunately translated as “I fancy your mother.”
She’s 96 and we are now apparently engaged.

From now on I’m sticking to charades and pointing.

Ah well, back to another ice cold glass of salted cod.

To play this poem directly in your browser – just click the “play” button below:
[audio:JVG_Poem20131103.mp3]

Also have a listen to the songs on the New Album “Angel In Reverse


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Bland On Bland – Music

Photo By Jools Thatcher
Photo By Jools Thatcher

The theme for this week’s JVG Radio Method poem is “ Music “.

Good afternoon Jon, and greetings from Alhama de Granada, a small town of around 3,000 people, high in the Sierra Nevada mountains of Andalucia, a bit over an hour from Granada itself.

Wandering round Alhama, I keep bumping into locals who look scarily like Ed, only a metre shorter, and I realise how much I miss collaborating with him each week.

As you well know Jon, writers can tend to be a little self absorbed, so to save me totally disappearing up my own emergency exit, Nano Marbella, an exceptional young flamenco guitarist who lives in a cave house on the outskirts of Granada, has kindly consented to join me for today’s offering, and we’ve set ourselves up in a small room above a restaurant, Nano sitting on the bed, me half in the wardrobe, praying the battery will last long enough to get this recorded.

For those interested in hearing Nano’s wonderful playing without me rambling all over the top, I have put an mp3 up on my website.

So nice to not have to face the music alone.

To play this poem directly in your browser – just click the “play” button below:
[audio:JVG_Poem20131027.mp3]

You can listen to Nano Marbella’s amazing guitar backing – just click the “play” button below:
[audio:20131027-NanoGuitar.mp3]

Also have a listen to the songs on the New Album “Angel In Reverse


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