Bland On Bland – Lying Down

Bland On Bland – The BookThe theme for this week’s JVG Radio Method poem is “Lying Down“.

Good afternoon Jon, and greetings for the last time, at least this trip, from Coventry.

It’s quite incredible how similar in some ways our countries are.
We have Tony Abbott and England has Boris Johnson.

Both store their shoes in their mouths, both take great pleasure in backdooring their leaders and both fancy themselves as future Prime Ministers – the only difference being, for one of them at least, it’s never going to happen.

Next week I am being transported back to the Antipodes for crimes against culture and good taste and it is with more than a tinge of sadness I pack my things ready for the trip home. Sad to be leaving, yet very happy to be arriving home in time for Radiothon, which of course everybody in the UK is talking about – makes a welcome relief from all the bullshit about Brexit.

Anyway, have to get back to my packing – no time to lie down


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Bland On Bland – Somebodys Something

Bland On Bland – The BookThe theme for this week’s JVG Radio Method poem is “Somebody’s Something“.

Good afternoon Jon and greetings from England.

Flat out playing small clubs and getting ready for a couple of festivals so I’ll just jump straight in this week …


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Bland On Bland – Radiothon 2016 Week 2

RRRBBQDay2014_046The theme for this week’s JVG Radio Method poem is “Radiothon 2016 Week 2“.

Good afternoon Jon, and for the last time, at least for the moment, greetings from Coventry.
Heading home to Melbourne in a couple of days.

A big thumbs up to all the volunteers in the phone room, RRR of course couldn’t function without the army of volunteers who contribute so much, and I hope you are making their lives absolutely miserable by jamming the phone lines as you ring to renew your subscription or become a new subscriber.
If not, give them a call now and make their lives even more stressful, they can take it.

That’s enough from me, I look forward to returning to the studio next week, but first I have to finish what I began last week and it’s back to the neighbourhood.


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Bland On Bland – Radiothon 2016 Week 1

RRRBBQDay2014_046The theme for this week’s JVG Radio Method poem is “Radiothon 2016 Week 1“.

Good afternoon Jon and greetings, this week, from Manchester.

Sad to be absent from the studio for Radiothon, one of my favourite times of the year and I know you have a full show this week, crammed with guests and it will be bedlam: very enjoyable bedlam I might add, so I’m not going to take up too much time.

If you have already subscribed to RRR, thank you very much and I hope you win one of the many fabulous prizes.
If you’ve been a subscriber in the past, we’d love to welcome you back, if you haven’t please consider coming on board, because you are the lifeblood of community radio.
That’s enough from me and as tradition dictates, it’s time to head back to the neighbourhood.


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Bland On Bland – Dishevelled People

IanwithBook-600x800The theme for this week’s JVG Radio Method poem is “Dishevelled People“.
Good afternoon Jon, and once again greetings from Coventry

Dishevelled eh? Pretty much describes everyone involved with The Radio Method.
Your themes have a very uncanny habit of reflecting what’s going on in my life and this one’s no exception.

To help pay the rent I’ve spent the last week mucking out three arenas at a horse riding camp, and I can assure you, 82 horses can produce an impressive amount of digestive bi-product – mountains of it in fact.
To describe me as ‘dishevelled’ comes close to a compliment – even the stable dogs won’t come anywhere near me.

The cheeky little buggers riding the horses refer to me as ‘Baldrick’ so I counter by loosening their girth straps while they’re at lunch. No serious injuries – yet!

On the positive side, one of my conditions of employment is I get to keep anything I find, which currently stands at around 7 tonnes – that’s more crap than an Andrew Bolt editorial.

Almost enough to create a scapegoat for the Census fiasco.

If I keep at it for another month there’ll be enough for a Donald Trump speech – well, the opening sentence at least.

There can be worse things in life than ‘dishevelled’.

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